Spitball Army

I guess if the South can have cheesy grits, then Boston can have bakedy beans and Olive Garden can have a bottomless salady bowl.

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If you mix milk with orange juice, you do not get a drink that tastes like a Creamsicle. Just FYI. It’s not like I tried it or anything.

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“Fetal” has absolutely nothing to do with “feta,” just so you know.

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There is an item on the McDonald’s menu called My Sweet Warmth. It’s listed just above the Hot Cherry Pie. #notkidding

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James Spann (right now [January 23rd] on TV): “This storm has hung in there like a hair in a biscuit.” Wuht?!

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The manager of the local Dunkin’ Donuts is a Kerouac-loving New Yorker novelist who has a Hunter S. Thompson dagger tattooed on his forearm.

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Two tablespoons of unsweetened cocoa powder Two tablespoons of sugar A dash of salt Boil one cup of milk. Pour milk into mixture and stir. Mix in 1/4 teaspoon of vanilla.

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MER Y CHRIS AS announces the flashing LED sign beside the Alabama gas station. FRI D PICKL S $1.00

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I see how little kids might find you creepy, she says between potluck bites, referencing his age and name-checking Santa Claus.

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Advent, Day 1: A bag of leftover Thanksgiving turkey gristle for the kitty. #24daysofadvent

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